What’s happening in communication?
ommunication and Influence
What’s happening in communication?
And vice versa
How do we turn what we mean into something someone else can understand?
Need shared knowledge and experiences.
Neural entrainment
Conversational Norms
Turntaking
And when to jump in
Speed
Tone of voice
Nonverbal Cues
Facial expression
Eye contact
Hand gestures
Proximity
Regional Differences in the US
New York
Fast
Okay for multiple people to talk at the same time
Okay to make comments to strangers
Regional Differences, continued
Southern US
Slower
One person at a time speaks
People don’t make comments to strangers
What do they think of each other?
Cross Cultural Norms
OR
Directness and Indirectness
Get to the point
Imply what is wanted
“It’s cold in here.”
Should you:
Shut the window?
Agree that it’s cold?
High Context and Low Context cultures
High context culture needs less explicit communication
Shared understanding, expectations
Low context culture requires explicit details
Face
Tied to respect and dignity
Important not to embarrass others
Yes or No?
“Yes, I agree.”
“Yes, I heard what you said.”
Sometimes considered rude to say “No.”
Gender and Communication
Conversational Rituals
Establishing status
Seeking consensus
Credit for Ideas
Women make suggestions but don’t get credit
Typically don’t talk as much as men
Men may take credit
Not maliciously
Not polite to fight or draw attention to oneself
Hedging
I’m not sure, but…..
I don’t know, but……
I’m no expert, but………
Sounds less confident
Apologizing
Women do a lot of apologizing
May just be politeness
May be perception that something merits apology
Makes you sound like you did something wrong.
Applying for Jobs
Women don’t apply unless they meet almost all criteria
“They won’t hire me because I only have 6 years of experience and the ad says 7.”
Men see a couple criteria that match
I’m overqualified
Influence
Robert Cialdini
Influence: How and Why People Agree to Things
Pre-suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade
6 “Weapons of Influence”
Reciprocity
Commitment and consistency
Social Proof/Consensus
Liking
Authority
Scarcity
22
Why do these work?
Many work because we respond almost automatically to norms.
Many con men / women are experts
23
Reciprocity
I give you something or do you a favor, and you feel obligated to do something in return
Hare Krishna fundraising
Charities that send you address labels, etc.
Free trial of anything
24
Social Proof / Consensus
Everybody else does it (has it, likes it, etc)
Conformity
Asch
Jonestown
Social loafing
Kitty Genovese
25
Liking
Similarity
Attractiveness
Compliments
Familiarity
26
Authority
Experimenter in Milgram study
Titles
Clothing & other status badges
27
Scarcity
Something in short supply is more attractive than something that is plentiful.
Psychological reactance
If freedom to choose something is threatened, people react to the threat
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