ommunication and Influence
What’s happening in communication?
And vice versa
How do we turn what we mean into something someone else can understand?
Need shared knowledge and experiences.
And when to jump in
Tone of voice
Regional Differences in the US
Okay for multiple people to talk at the same time
Okay to make comments to strangers
Regional Differences, continued
One person at a time speaks
People don’t make comments to strangers
What do they think of each other?
Cross Cultural Norms
Directness and Indirectness
Get to the point
Imply what is wanted
“It’s cold in here.”
Shut the window?
Agree that it’s cold?
High Context and Low Context cultures
High context culture needs less explicit communication
Shared understanding, expectations
Low context culture requires explicit details
Tied to respect and dignity
Important not to embarrass others
Yes or No?
“Yes, I agree.”
“Yes, I heard what you said.”
Sometimes considered rude to say “No.”
Gender and Communication
Credit for Ideas
Women make suggestions but don’t get credit
Typically don’t talk as much as men
Men may take credit
Not polite to fight or draw attention to oneself
I’m not sure, but…..
I don’t know, but……
I’m no expert, but………
Sounds less confident
Women do a lot of apologizing
May just be politeness
May be perception that something merits apology
Makes you sound like you did something wrong.
Applying for Jobs
Women don’t apply unless they meet almost all criteria
“They won’t hire me because I only have 6 years of experience and the ad says 7.”
Men see a couple criteria that match
Influence: How and Why People Agree to Things
Pre-suasion: A Revolutionary Way to Influence and Persuade
6 “Weapons of Influence”
Commitment and consistency
Why do these work?
Many work because we respond almost automatically to norms.
Many con men / women are experts
I give you something or do you a favor, and you feel obligated to do something in return
Hare Krishna fundraising
Charities that send you address labels, etc.
Free trial of anything
Social Proof / Consensus
Everybody else does it (has it, likes it, etc)
Experimenter in Milgram study
Clothing & other status badges
Something in short supply is more attractive than something that is plentiful.
If freedom to choose something is threatened, people react to the threat